Saturday, April 28, 2012

LET GO OF YOUR PAST....


Greetings Beautiful Mothers,

Today was the German festival that was organized by my daughter’s school. I had volunteered to be at the rummage sale station.  The work started a couple of days ago. When I walked into the gymnasium yesterday almost half of the gym was filled with black garbage bags stuffed with donated clothes. These donated clothes are sold at the fair and all the proceeds go to the school. 

I was excited to see what the day would bring. One by one we sorted through each bag, organized and categorized them and by the end of the day the gymnasium  looked like a Chinese warehouse!

One side of the gym was dedicated to rows and rows of  miscellaneous items, like little decorations, trinkets , kitchen wares, I even saw some cassettes and cassette player, out dated TVs, Christmas items, glasses, cups plates anything you can think of , it was there!


The other side , well clothes, clothes and more clothes!!

                                                           Flea market

I love to watch people and this is what I was doing, there was not much I could do except to inform them of the dollar a bag deal. People came in steadily, looking for a find, some walked away with frames, some with lamp shades and a lot came prepared to buy clothes for their friends, grand kids, family and neighbors. Groups came and went filling their bags with the goodies, went to the festival ate those delicious German sausages and left.

One particular lady caught my eye. She was intensely feminine, had ultra pale skin and her red hair was loosely tied at the back. The contrast made her look very distinct yet she was shy and her mannerisms were that of a teenager.
She was picking up each article of clothing and if she did not like it she would fold it and neatly pile it  beside her, reorganizing whatever she rejected. She made no eye contact with me until I found something for her. It was an orange dress that had some Indian style design and when she put it against her, the red hair stood out, she looked beautiful!  

She shyly took the dress, folded it neatly into a small packet, compressed it with both her hands and placed it inside her bag, pressed it with some force to make room for more in that bag and said “ I don’t really go out much, I stay home most of the time. I am on disability for many reasons. I live alone and I cannot work. I stay home and this is the first time in eight months I have been out. I don’t even like to talk to people, but I feel like talking to you.”

This statement made me feel simultaneously comfortable and uneasy. After I quickly shifted from the initial discomfort I was able to look beyond her expressions and her words and  just simply saw her for her.

I made a connection with her spirit. She said she was forty but she really looked 19 to me. I wondered if I should invite her for a German sausage dog outside and listen to some music. My heart won this argument and so I invited her. After a little hesitation she agreed to join me and followed me like a little lamb and we sat on the benches and ate lunch together.


                                                    Window


As the music trailed in the air, the inflatable bouncy slides added depth of color to the visual in the background, the white tents with the vendors and their wares, little children running around freely, laughter ringing faintly, transported me to a different dimension all together.

Her conversation was at once that of a child and also an hurt adult, innocent and irregular. We talked about butterflies, dried flowers and her heart break. I was engaged with her and she laughed and talked and told me a lot of herself, like I was her best friend. Then all of a sudden a silence descended upon her and she asked for some sweet tea. I walked to the stall to get her the tea and when I came back, she was gone! My eyes raced to  see if I can get a glimpse of her leaving in her car or walking away in a distance but nothing. And again, I was left there holding the sweet tea in my hands, feeling the contradictory moment of having met a stranger and having lost a stranger. 


                                  flea market

I am not sure why I am sharing this story with you but somewhere in my heart I felt that it had to be shared. That was just it, a happy day and moment caught with a stranger. I do not want to add a message to this and make it cryptic or forcibly enlightening. It was a mysterious encounter, almost surreal and definitely worth sharing with you! 

I walked into the gymnasium, looked at the mass of clothes, now in disorganized heaps all over the floor. Those old things that we hold on to, we think might serve us one day but really all it does is occupy space in our lives physically, mentally and emotionally. And right now at this very moment we can choose to let go of the old and start afresh with new ideas, new hope and a new you!

Until tomorrow mothers, throw away that which does not serve you and be present for the gift of now.

As usual if you have any questions or comments I am here to help you!
I teach moms (also via Skype sessions) to identify and release the blockages that hold them back, to find within them the  empowerment to gain clarity of vision, achieve  their most audacious dreams and find profound success , fulfillment and peace.
251-609-1251
©alivewithadwiti LLC
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1 comment:

  1. Very touching narration.If only you could have found her when you got back with tea..maybe then you could have hugged her tight ....for your inner peace and perhaps mine too...may your contradictory moment of ''having met a stranger and having lost a stranger'' may be blessed by supreme soul & let it just remain as ''Having found a friend'' soon...
    God bless you for all your good deeds.superb narration.

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